Extemporaneously Kate

Everything by the seat of my pants!

My brother.

Posted by Kate on 11:03 AM
Is a photographer.  He did a project recently where he took everything he owned, photoed it, and then categorized it by worth to him.  It was his senior project and I had no idea about it.  It was well done and got recognition on some blog.  There was a blurb by him below his project.   Reading it confirmed what I had suspected for the past 25 years:  I don't know this guy.

My brother and I, while related, are perfect strangers.  We spawned from the same people, lived in the same house, ate the same food, and went to (for the most part) the same schools all just three years apart but I don't know him.  We're not close and we're very different.  It bothers me but at the same time it doesn't because I think he's alright with this.  And if he's ok with it, I don't feel like dealing with it.

I think we could have been close and I'm pretty sure we were on the road to regular sibling relationship until my parents divorced and emotionally he and I were in "every man for themselves" mode.  At least, that's what I blame it on.  I know I became more emotionally self centered at that time and difficult to deal with.   Looking back on the last 20 years,  well, more like going back 5 years and then looking back on the last 15 years (oh the confusion), I can see that I was concerned with nobody's life but my own.  About the time I got my head out of my ass, he was already 10 hours away and wasn't interested in anything but his own life.

Now I'm married, he's graduated from college, and we're completely oblivious of one another.  It's like we were classmates once but no longer.  We don't even have any negative feelings towards one another.  Well I don't.  I can't speak for him.  We just don't know each other.  I think that when our parents die, we will slip into deeper waters of indifference where we are strangers forever.  Who knows?

Comments (2)

Anonymous Anonymous
January 14, 2011 at 12:05 PM  

It's a shame you and your brother seem like strangers to each other, but it might be better than a hateful relationship? Not sure.

Blogger focusing the lens
January 14, 2011 at 8:05 PM  

His project sounds like a really awesome idea, and I may have to try something like that.

I don't have a very good relationship with my younger brother to be honest. We fight a lot, and he's really pig-headed. My older brother and I are a bit closer, but we haven't lived in the same house for over 12 years, so we have parted ways a bit over time.

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